Just for fun?

[Nikki 2]

How about having a post where we could respond with poetry etc "just-for-fun?"
I wrote a poem a little while ago for a friend who had run into a cow on his Motorbike. Neither cow nor friend were hurt - although the bike was! (The friend works at a dairy factory on Bodmin Moor)
My poem is just a bit of fun, and amusing - but it really, really isn't at all deep and meaningful!!
How do people feel about posting such light-hearted humour?

[Nightfalls]

yea i think it would
i enjoy the more humorous side of life.

[Spirit Bear]

Sounds great to me too

[Nikki 2]

Ok . . . It's called :- Cow-nt your Blessings -
(and it really is just silly fun)

Cow-nt Your Blessings
Cownt your blessings that you didn't get hurt
In future the farmer will be more alert
Legal proceedings will go smooth as silk
So don't get all churned up crying over spilt milk
That cow's so ungrateful - It could have been dead
What it should give you's a pat on the head!
Some say they've herd that the mad cow is crazy
But that gave you no reason to go pushing up Daisy.
Don't get too sour, don't get too cheesed
Although you have reason to feel bitter and peeved
Just wipe from its face that sly look of mirth
And milk that cow for all that it's worth.
Your dairy-devil days are a thing of the past -
Ure gonna have to remember to not drive so fast.
Steer clear of all live-stock, think on the hoof
And if you can't manage that then make sure you've got proof
Next time you en-cow-nter a bovine shout "HAY!"
Moo-ve over you blighter, get out of my whey!

[wyeuro]

what a torrent of truly horrible puns!!!!! very very funny.
Here's one of mine. It's a song really, to the tune of 'the real ol' mountain dew'.

catsclaws.

at the end of me paws there's a neat row of claws
and they're sharp as the devil can make 'em,
and i sharpens 'em with care on a well stuffed chair
and i'm careful as can be not to break 'em.

refrain:

oh it's good to be a fish and i've heard some wish
they could fly where the eagle soars
but i'd rather be a cat all shiny and fat
with me paws full of awesome claws.

oh it's curved they are like a scimitar
or the crescent moon that shines
and I use them well as i soon shall tell
as you comfortably reclines.

refrain

though they're fair and fine and they gleam and shine
they are not just ornamental
cos i digs 'em in to a person's skin
and i nearly drives 'em mental!!!!

refrain.

wyverne /|\

[Nikki 2]

Thank you Wyeuro. I was a tad wary about posting it - so glad you liked it! Strangely my friend took a lot longer to appreciate the funny side Lol.
I love your poem! It should be read by Pam Ayres. It really made me giggle.

[Spirit Bear]

Thanks wyeuro and Nikki.


I like both your poems.
Going to search for that tune Wyeuro said on youtube so that I can sing the catsclaw song next time my cats are a little bit wild showing me their love

[Nikki 2]

Good idea Spirit Bear! I will search too.

[Spirit Bear]

Hi Nikki,

Here it is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=el9oCY0- ... re=related

and from the Dubliners: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6K3zMupW ... re=related

I tried to fit the text of Wyeuro into this song but or there's text missing or there's too much music.... or there's something wrong with my ears....
I can't figure it out how the text should fit in this tune.
It's that I don't drink alcoholic beverages. As it is an Irish song maybe you only get the grip of it after drinking some Guinness Maybe you can try it an tell me

[wyeuro]

i should have realised, there are probably a lot of tunes by that name. i got it from the clancy brothers, from the 1950s and 60s. here's a link.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ht96kIT_Guc
thanks for liking it. i'm not allowed to sing it because it gives 'em ideas.

[Nikki 2]

Ah . .A new link . . . mystery solved. LOl.
Thanks.
Wyeuro - you have just had Spirit Bear, Elemental Being and myself all singing along to Cat's Claws.

[Nikki 2]

Thank you Spirit Bear. As far as the guiness goes . . . I'm afraid that I don't do the alcoholic beverage thing either! Lol. Elemental Being does however - but I can assure you that it doesn't improve his singing one iota despite what he might believe!

[wyeuro]

well, cats are tee-total, too. hehe, i'll drink to that!
but come one, you guys, bring out your funny poems!

[Nikki 2]

Here's another one. My husband is Pisces and it started from there -

Two Little Fishes
Two little fishes swam right by -
The girl on the river-bank, the apple of their eye.
One gave a nod and the other gave a wink,
And one little girl with her cheeks flushed pink.

Two little fishes cavorting by the shore,
Beckoned to the girl, to join them on the ocean floor.
One gave a wink, and the other gave a grin,
As they danced together cheek-to-cheek and hand to tail fin.

[wyeuro]

oh, now, these are fairies, i reckon. little mer-fairies.

[Nikki 2]

Erm - I got bored this afternoon !

Tabatha
"Tabatha" is what I'm called
n' before you smile with mirth
Me sister's name is Abraham
We got mixed up at birth!

I'm Tabatha - the tabby tom,
Me person's name's Terese
She wears a tall black pointy 'at,
And 'er cloak reaches 'er knees.

The broomstick in the corner
Has seen some better days
(I think it's due an M.O.T
Before the next moon-phase)

With the bristles getting thinner
And me belly getting fat,
That balancing aint easy
For an aging tabby cat!

Me colouring's not normal
For a witch's cat I know
But they tell me tabby's the new black
And quite the way to go.

Don't get to see the cat-walk
And fashion aint me thing
But it gives one that "je ne sais quoi"
Puts in one's step a spring.

[ElementalBeing]

Nikki 2, that is such fun! wherever do you get your ideas from?

EB

[Nikki 2]

yeah - ok Elemental Being - I admit it - it was kind-of (but only very very VERY vaguely) your idea!!!
Husbands eh?

[wyeuro]

great. hey, are you putting these into a book? people love this sort of stuff (i do anyway) and you're really good at it. funny, good scansion, great rhythm, exact rhyming - it's a great talent. can't get enough of it. more more.

[wyeuro]

here's anothery of mine. i put one on a while ago, but forgot to put it on this thread. getting a bit muddle-headed as i approach the next topic. we've had some good rains here and the land is rejoicing - the wombat dances on his warren and the energy is amazing. he sort of stands there and stomps, and there's this roaring of energy that is only just not audible as sound. land magic.

my name is wally wombat
my home is underground
this way, along the footpath -
i’d like to show you round!

the outside isn’t much, i know,
mud-walls, a crumbling dome,
a dancing floor, a middens heap,
but still, it’s home sweet home.

and once you get inside the door,
it's done up really neat:
smooth walls, slate floors - we've used pink batts
to moderate the heat.

just hang your hat beside the door
and let me take your coat
and here’s a nice cold drink of beer
to wet your dusty throat.

here’s wilma, warren, wanda,
yeah, with all me mates and rellies,
we had some rain the other day,
that’s why they’re wearing wellies.

through there’s my private quarters,
there’s nothing much to see,
my bed, computer, bike and shower
and place to watch tv.

it’s small, and cosy, clean enough,
a solid roof above,
a place to bring my sheilas when
i’m in the mood for love.

that winding tunnel, dark and deep
goes nearly half a mile
it leads to ritual chambers
which we enter single file

my clan have occupied this mound
for long millennia, mate,
and will for many thousands more ,
it is our families’ fate!

this spiral staircase, leading down
is where our cellars are -
uh, some commend our wine-list,
‘dyou like to taste, m’shah?

freezer, fridge and cool-room
where we keep our salads cool,
tennis court and billiards, and
a spa and swimming-pool

i am a happy wombat,
hardworking, honest, true!
and thanks for dropping in on me,
yeah, that was good of you.

i have enjoyed your company
drop in again, one day
there’ll be an ice cold beer for you
and ‘g’day, mate!’ we’ll say!