In memory of my mother

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In memory of my mother

Postby Twig » 20 May 2012, 05:43

Three days after I euthanized my beloved Riley, I got a phone call from my dad telling me that my mother had been hospitalized. Upon my arrival there, I learned that 99% of her left coronary artery was blocked, and 95% of her right coronary artery was blocked. Apparently, she'd been having chest pains for almost a month but didn't tell me what was happening because of my situation with Riley. Her choices were to go home and likely die within a week or to undergo risky bypass surgery. She chose the surgery. It's a long, complicated story, but the end result was that we had to take her off of life support after five brutal days when we finally learned that she'd had four major and several minor strokes, one of which was in her brain stem. She continued to breathe without the ventilator, but died on the 15th of May. I never saw this coming even though my mother was 86 years old.

So, my lessons in dealing with death are coming upon me rapidly. I am home only until Sunday morning when I have to go back for her service. My dad is pretty lost; I'm not sure how I'll handle the situation. Anyway, I realize that I've been lots of "take" and very little "give" on this board lately, but I would greatly appreciate any good vibes you can send to Mother. She is well on her way by now; I just want to ensure her a safe journey. I'll be back on the 29th. :hug:
"...some part of me is tree." -- Stephanie Kaza (Buddhist author)

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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby skh » 20 May 2012, 08:04

Twig, my thoughts are with you and your family, and your mother.

:candle: :candle: :candle:

peace /|\
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby D'Arzhur » 20 May 2012, 09:03

:candle: for your mum
:hug: for you Twig with all my love for you and yours...
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Crystal Dragon » 20 May 2012, 10:31

So very sorry to read this post Twig and so soon after Riley's passing.

:hug: Love & Blessings to you and your Dad

:candle: For your Mum
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Bracken » 20 May 2012, 10:44

Oh, Twig. I'm thinking about you, dearheart.
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Hennie » 20 May 2012, 12:58

:candle:
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Selene » 20 May 2012, 14:37

Twig, I am so sorry for your double loss. Strength to you, dear.

:candle: :candle:
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Michael C. Page » 20 May 2012, 17:30

:candle:
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby serenarian » 21 May 2012, 09:51

Thinking of you Twig, my love goes out to you.

:candle: for your mother and to bless her on her journey.

:candle: for you.
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Nachtfalke » 21 May 2012, 10:29

:candle:
I'm sorry...
bright blessings,
Nachtfalke

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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Susanne » 21 May 2012, 10:46

Twig
I am so very sorry for your incredible losses. Sending love & healing to you :hug: & your dad.
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Kat Lady » 21 May 2012, 11:03

Blessings to you and your family at this difficult time. :hug:
:candle:
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Willowen » 22 May 2012, 23:54

Dear Twig,
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Strength and healing energy to you.
:candle:
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Sandibw » 15 Jun 2012, 03:14

Twig My thoughts are with you and your family, I too lost my father very suddenly almost 2 yrs. ago.
The only thing I can tell you is no matter what remember your mother's smile, forget the hospitals. Remember her love, remember the things that made both of you laugh together, remember the joy that was her life. And be with your family.
Sending you hugs from the distances.
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Erithe » 15 Jun 2012, 14:10

:candle:
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Twig » 18 Jun 2012, 20:27

Thank you so much, everyone. Y'all have been so kind to post here. I must confess that I'm having a rough go of it. My dad was here for Father's Day, but we both avoided the elephant in the room. He really doesn't want to discuss anything about my mother. So, we had a good time. I treated him to a couple of pints & dinner at a local brew pub.

When he left a couple of hours ago, I got slammed to the floor. So much loss, so fast. It's interesting that logic plays absolutely no part in this process. Sure, my dog had cancer, and my mother was 86 years old (but I had no idea she was in such bad health; she tended not to talk about aches and pains). I am surprised that I am surprised when grief runs me down!

:blink:

Sandibw: I am sorry about the loss of your dad. I am so wanting to take your advice -- I wish I could get those last images of my mother out of my head, but they keep returning so matter how hard I try to ignore them. It was a terrible way to die.
"...some part of me is tree." -- Stephanie Kaza (Buddhist author)

"It takes courage to live ordinary lives." -- Connie Schultz (newspaper columnist)

:awen: :terra: :seasons:

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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Twyrch » 13 Feb 2013, 16:17

Judy, I'm so sorry for the loss of your mother. I haven't been on much and missed this post. I hope the grief has passed and changed into a celebration of life. :candle:
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Re: In memory of my mother

Postby Twig » 14 Feb 2013, 00:39

Thank you, Twyrch. :hug:

Everyday is still a mine field This is my first experience with serious grief, so I just go with whatever hits me on any given day. Of course, as you know, the holidays are always terrible. It's just me and my father now. Mother loved Christmas; she was like a little kid that way... The anniversary dates are coming one after another at a seemingly blazing speed. Sometimes it still doesn't even seem real.
"...some part of me is tree." -- Stephanie Kaza (Buddhist author)

"It takes courage to live ordinary lives." -- Connie Schultz (newspaper columnist)

:awen: :terra: :seasons:

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