I'll hasten to follow Flidais by submitting a poem that I wrote some time ago, which I really wound up not liking at all.
The poem is about my great-grandfather who committed suicide long before I was born.
Although the manner of his death wasn't exactly a secret, it also wasn't something that was openly discussed in our family, and those few tidbits that I do know will never be fleshed out, as everyone who was in a position to know the details is now dead.
When my mother died nearly two years ago, my sister obtained a box containing many old documents and letters, including my great-grandfather's suicide note, which my sister and I never knew existed.
What little I know is that my great-grandfather was a butcher and worked at a meat-packing plant in San Antonio, Texas. I suppose health standards in 1929 weren't what they are today (or -- horrors -- maybe they are!
) because the story goes that my great-grandfather told his wife that he was taking his pistol down to the plant on a weekend morning to shoot rats, which apparently were a problem then. Instead of shooting rats, he shot himself, and left the note I mentioned.
Here is a copy of that note:
In my poem, "Louis," I tried to write about the questions that I have as to why he did what he did, and about how he must have felt in the minutes leading up to his final act.
I had lots of material to work with: the questions, the suicide note, the stark scene. But I felt that my poem got bogged down in an annoying rhyming scheme, and I'm not even sure now why I constructed it that way.
I'm of a mind to completely tear the thing up and start over, but I need help because I'm not even sure what form it should take. How does one decide a poem's form? Before writing it, or does it just sort of happen of its own accord? Any help will be appreciated!
And after that long preamble, here is the link to my poem.