dying attraction

[Zylah]

OK, I know that's a weird thread title, but I couldn't think of a better one!

I am wondering if some of you would share your thoughts on this odd phenomenon I've had going on: several different small creatures have come to me when they are dying, and stayed with me for their last moments. I was in my garden when a luna moth fluttered over (this has happened before, though not this year). Wings were tattered and two legs were broken, but its fat fuzzy body and multi-branched antennae were perfect. Still beautiful, I thought; but it was dying. It sat in the palm of my hand and shivered on and off; after a few minutes, it died. I sat on the earth beneath one of my favorite trees and tried to be whatever comfort I could until it was dead, and then I placed it gently into an empty birds' nest I'd found on the ground earlier that day.

Today I was walking beside the Susquehanna River, which was covered with dragonflies. I bent to splash some water on my neck (it's freakin' hot today!) and one of the light-blue dragonflies landed beside me. I looked more closely when it thrashed around, and it was dying. I put out my hand, and it crawled in. I stood there beside the river for a few minutes; eagles were soaring overhead, screeching; I asked it where it would like me to place its body when it had passed, and I felt it wanted to be in the water. So when it had gone, I put the body into the water and let the current sweep it away.

No more than a few minutes later, a black and red butterfly (don't know what kind) fluttered over and landed on my shoulder. It fluttered around some more, bounced off my wrist and fell to the ground. Jake said, "Why does everything come to you to die?" and I said I was just wondering the same thing. I bent over and offered my hand, and the butterfly fluttered up toward my shoulder again. It fell off, landed in my hand. It stayed for a few minutes, but was startled by Jake's shadow and flew off. I followed it briefly, but it flew further away, so I wished it peace and continued my own way.

These are the three latest examples of this odd phenomenon - I've had birds also do this, just not as recently; so I'm wondering what it is that makes me a magnet for dying creatures. I don't enjoy it, of course; it makes me sad to see them dying; but I do what I can.

[emmao1111]

Hi Zylah - I'm so glad you wrote about this as I have been experiencing the same thing!

It all started when I did my initiation ceremony in my back garden and was surrounded by black flies. Since then all sorts of flying creatures have been attracted to me, some of which have been dying. E.g a large bumble bee fell from the skies and landed at my feet. Even my friends are joking about me being an insect magnet! (Some of them suspect my perfume is killing them off - not likelya s I have been wearing the same sort for 10 years!)

Other things have been happening too like being able to feed wild birds from my hands in the garden, and this week, sadly a greenfinch came to me injured and died in my hands. I am still coming to terms with it all as it's only been happening for a few months. I would be very interested to know if others experience the same things and if they have any insights into why?

[katie bridgewater]

I don't think it's that you are a magnet for dying creatures, death is all around us all the time in many forms, but perhaps you are more mindful of the other non-human beings that surround you and therefore appreciate and notice those that land on or near you. I have lived for many years in places full of beings but not many human ones and most places are teeming with life, and death, if you stop and watch and listen. Insects especially hatch, breed, live and die en masse, so in the right time at the right moment, folks will see many damsel flies dying all around them, or may-bugs plunge to their death in Corwen's mass of hair...
I think it just shows that you are sensitive and aware, in a way that most people are not. Most humans would just brush a little creature off them, but a few will watch and enquire and wait and notice. I don't find it necessary to see messages, meanings and lessons in these occurrences. Such moments have intrinsic joy, beauty and sadness. I just wonder whose lap I might land on in my last moments when it is my turn?

[Zylah]

@ Emma: I was hoping I wasn't the only one

@ Katie: point well taken, there is much to be said for a heightened sensitivity to our surroundings. Honestly, I didn't post as someone who has recently become more sensitive to normal goings-on, however; I've always noticed tiny creatures and observed them. The reason I posted was that it is *unusual* for me to have this number of insects and birds coming and then dying in my immediate vicinity. When something unusual happens on a semi-regular basis, I tend to inquire into how and why and wherefore.

This leads to something I've been thinking about on and off of late, as I've been around the board more - Katie, don't take this as directed toward you specifically, and everyone please understand this is *not* a rant, I just would like to clarify a few thoughts : I know that to the more pragmatic druids, the more mystically minded druids seem flaky and always imagining things, and wishing really, really REALLY hard that they could be magical and elven, or like a Disney princess with birds singing and helping tie ribbons in hair and so forth. There's a self-centered childish egotism in this, of which we may seem to be (and sometimes ARE) guilty.

However, in our defense, I would like to say that many of us are not trying to live in Fairyland; in speaking for myself, I can say that I am thrilled with the natural world I really do live in, and I don't need to make it more magical than it is. I am studying for a profession in applied practical science (nursing), and science is all the magic I need. I am not trying to impose the 'supernatural' on the natural world when I explore mysticism, personally. I don't believe in the supernatural per se, I believe that everything in the universe is rooted in nature, or it couldn't exist.

Spiritual and physical realms do not seem mutually exclusive to me, since physics tells us matter and energy make up the universe; neither can be created or destroyed, and our ability to explain it, while quite astonishing, is WAAYYY far from complete. Matter is not really solid, if it comes down to subatomic levels; energy is complex and mystifying. Nature follows certain patterns we call 'laws', but those laws can be bent or manipulated if the right concepts are applied. (Gravity, for instance.) We are, in other words, able to direct energy (which to me includes matter, when you strip it all down to bare bones) in order to accomplish things; to do this, humans apply imagination - another form of energy - and then try to duplicate imagination (which could also be called visualization) and theory in the apparent, visible realm. This is science; this is magic.

I believe that the science we understand and can explain is still quite limited, and there are vast tracts of yet unexplored, un-illuminated territory. Our technology would seem magical to someone from Elizabethan England, but of course it's just applied science. In the same way, when I encounter in nature something I can't explain, I don't ascribe it to me being spectacular super-mortal material and attracting some kind of special magic because I'm so fae, or whatever ; I do want to find out, though, if others have experienced it and what theories there might be about how and why etc.

So! I find it odd that lately an increased number of small creatures come to me in their dying moments. Not because I never saw them before, and have never seen death. I see quite a lot of that, given my field of study. Death doesn't shock me, it's quite commonplace and I do know this. However, the phenomenon I started the thread about remains inexplicable to me, and I'm curious.

I hope that makes sense, and clarifies my intention with the thread a bit.

[childofthewoods]

I read this post with interest as I too am starting to wonder if I am some kind of death magnet!!! (I mean that in nicest possible way!)

My experiences started last summer when I nursed a baby sparrow back to full health after it falling from the nest and the parents abandoning it....only to be able to get it back to nest and accepted again and then it falling out again and dying anyway.

After this there have been a fairly constant flow of animals from butterflies, mice and even a cat that had just been victim of a 'hit & run'. I tried to take the cat to the vets but it died on the way. I then knocked on doors around my village until I found out who it belonged to.

The most recent one was the other morning....a fully grown sparrow dead, but with not a mark on it, on my doorstep. It looked like it had just drifted down from the sky and rested there peacefully before dying of old age!

[Huathe]

Zylah,

I agree with Katie. You are probably more attentive to the natural world around you than the majority of people, but still I do wonder if you may have some kind of special gift. That, I cannot say.

I used to collect and raise various caterpillars/eggs and feed them and study their life cycle from juvenile to adult. The Luna moth was one example. Big Silk Moths like the Luna cannot eat at all during their adult stage. They live off the fat they stored as a caterpillar. The one you found probably was starving to death. They live only a short time. Maybe a week or so. Just enough time to mate and lay eggs.

Dragonflies are born as nymphs in the water. So " yours " only returned to the place it was born. It returned home.

[Zylah]

Hey, CotW - again, it really is nice to not be the only one.

Hi James - I did actually know that about moths; it was one of those things that stuck with me when I read it, since I found it so fascinating. I also knew about nymphs, and yes, they were all flocking 'home' which was why the water was virtually coated with them at times. Very cool to see!

So again, I will try to emphasize: it is not the death that surprises me. NOT. What does surprise me is the disproportionately high number of creatures *in my immediate vicinity* when death came. This has never happened before, except on a smaller scale about 6 years ago. The reason I find it interesting is that it is unusual; dragonflies do not normally park on my hand to die, nor do butterflies perch on my shoulder, etc. etc. That's the whole point, this is not ordinary. I am perfectly aware of what *IS* ordinary; I haven't been paying any more or less attention than I usually do.

Nor am I saying I have a 'special gift' of some kind. Which is why I posted it here, in the hope of people saying, 'hey, me too!' and pooling our experiences to find commonalities etc. Which some people *have* said in their replies.

I am not drawing any conclusions, nor am I fishing for some obscure compliment. I simply wanted input as to what others experience, and/or what the thoughts of others are. So in that vein I do appreciate what every person has said, my only objection is when I feel I have been misunderstood; hence the attempt at clarifying.

However, if it's not clear now, I don't think I can explain it any better, so I shall give up on trying as of this point!

[emmao1111]

Hi Zylah - The weirdness continues for me. I have had more and more animal experiences and then last week while I was out on patrol, a car stopped right by the side of me. The lady driver had a massive CVA and died in my arms.

I'm starting to wonder if i'm being trained for a job on "the other side" - my friend thinks i'll be some kind of soul collector? It's a theory...not necessarily the right one, but interesting nonetheless.

[Mountainheart]

V.interesting subject. I think that it isn't just a case of you being sensitive to nature, but of the natural world around you also being actively aware of your sensitivity.

I've not had the dying creature experience, but I do find that many animals just seem to like me. I think they instinctively realise that I love, accept and care for them and that they respond accordingly. This isn't just with animals that I know, but with new acquaintances too.

(Plants also seem to react well to my care).

Thx
David